When my son was 5 years old, he was running around the aisles in a clothing store, and I declared, “Stop running in circles!”

To which he replied, “I’m not, I’m running in rectangles!”

Fair enough.

First, good job future lawyer. But second… I felt I had to close that “loophole”.

The government likes to believe it knows best, and treats us citizens like children who must be told what not to do for our own good.

A loophole by another name is called Liberty. Remember what that is? Free people doing what they can still do after being told “no” in a very specific way. Complying with a law and still doing what you want is called Liberty, not a loophole. But it begs the question, why should it be a law at all then?

In California, we complied with “assault weapon” laws in 1989 that forced the registration of specifically named weapons and banned future sales: we bought weapons that weren’t on the ban list by name. Same weapon, different name.

If “Armalite Model 15” was banned by listed name, we bought “off list lowers” or weapons with a name like “Armagerd Mamby Pamby 16”. Ok, it didn’t exactly happen like that, but you get the idea, and it’s something my 5yo son would have said.

We complied with new “assault weapon” laws in 2000 that banned certain features on a centerfire rifle, pistol, or shotgun with detachable magazines.

On a centerfire rifle with a detachable magazine, if it had a pistol grip, flash hider, forward pistol grip, collapsable stock, thumbhole stock, or a grenade launcher (not that term again…) it was an “assault weapon” and had to be registered and banned for future sale, manufacture, and transfer. Or if it had a fixed magazine (defined as requiring a tool to remove the magazine, a bullet also being a tool) it couldn’t accept more than 10 rounds, otherwise it was an “assault weapon”.

However, if your centerfire rifle with a detachable magazine DIDN’T have those features, it was fine. Or if it had a fixed magazine with only 10 rounds, it could have all those features. We complied with the law. This is not a loophole; it was specifically written into the law what you had to have or not have on your rifle to trigger “assault weapon” status.

Yet here we are again, a new decade, another “assault weapon” law to screw over everyone who complied with the previous laws, all while claiming “we need to close this dangerous bullet button loophole!”

Yes, we get the spirit of your laws; too bad you can’t find the perfect words in order to do that. Once you issue that specific command, that specific law, you better expect free citizens are going to “run in rectangles” instead.

You don’t want free citizens owning semi automatic rifles, we get that. And you’re trying to find any conceivable way to make that happen.

But the free market of ideas is smarter than any of you tyrants. We’ve thought of things you could never even dream of, just waiting for these unjust laws to be finalized and passed.

Free citizens, I implore you: find Liberty in the law. Read it, read it carefully, and ask yourself, “what DOESN’T it say I can’t do?” Think outside the law.

Buy stripped lowers. Mill your own from 80% receivers. Make featureless rifles. Make a rifle that requires you to disassemble the action easier in order to change the magazine. Make more Title 1 Other long guns (guns that aren’t rifles because they were never built with a stock, nor pistols because they’re over 26″ overall and have a barrel that’s 16″ or longer) as these aren’t covered by “assault weapon” laws. Buy completed lowers separately from the upper. Buy a rimfire rifle; they’re exempt from “assault weapon” laws, or always have a dedicated .22 upper or conversion kit.

Disassemble your +10rd mags, or put a blocking follower in them and keep the original follower.

Register a rifle (or lower) as an assault weapon and switch out the Bullet Button for a standard mag release. There’s nothing in the law that says you can’t. You’ll already have a registered assault weapon; they can’t get you for manufacturing an assault weapon out of a registered assault weapon. Just know, eventually it’ll be confiscated.

If you even care about following the law, make it a game to keep everything you have and get everything you want. Then fight the law anyway you can.

Or don’t comply at all, I don’t care.

To you tyrants… please, keep treating us like children, and we promise to keep running rectangles around you every chance we get.

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2 thoughts on “Please, treat us gun owners like children

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